Sharing a meal can be viewed as a form of non-sexual intercourse

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To celebrate a special occasion, my wife (my first ministry) and I dined at a nice restaurant last night. Hey, since we now live in the back of the woods in rural Tennessee, going out for dinner is something to write about😆. It was one of those places that serve ice-cold water in glass bottles, and they replace it with a fresh bottle and new glasses before it gets half empty. Even an electric pepper grinder with LED lighting. While the food was excellent and our waitress treated us like royalty, the most important point I want to make is about intimacy.

Enjoying a meal with your lawfully wedded spouse is a form of intimacy, so significant that it can be considered a type of non-sexual intercourse. This perspective aligns with why the Scriptures advise on whom we should or should not invite into our homes, whom to eat with, and what kind of fellowship we should maintain. Unfortunately, many churches today have lost this understanding.

The term non-sexual intercourse in Latin (intercursus) describes a special and intimate connection between individuals. It is defined as “an exchange, especially of thoughts or feelings; communion. An act of running between, from intercurrere, meaning to run between.”

Just as partaking in the Lord’s Supper during a Holy Communion service is an act of deep intimacy, a meal between a husband and wife should be viewed with the same seriousness—that it constitutes a non-sexual form of intercourse.

I often wish I had the testimonies of famous historical figures who claimed they never shared a meal alone with any woman other than their wife. However, as a police officer in Los Angeles (LAPD), where mandatory partnerships are a requirement, that was not always feasible. There was a certain discomfort in enjoying a nice meal at a restaurant with an attractive female partner while my wife was at home. At times, we even dined at places frequented by celebrities. If I could start over, for religious reasons, I would refuse to be assigned a female partner (see comments).

This belief has become my conviction, which I share with you today. Orthodoxy matters, and practicing that orthodoxy (orthopraxy) is even more important. While I never strayed with a partner, it’s no surprise that the adultery rate in law enforcement is so high.

Men, cherish your wives, not your partners.

“Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.” – Ecclesiastes 9:9

“Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.” – Proverbs 5:18-19

“But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolator, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.’ – 1 Corinthians 5:11

“Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.” – 1 Corinthians 10:31

“Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” – 1 Peter 3:7

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